Take action…

I first saw this meme and laughed. This holds truth in so many ways right ladies?! It seems like after a break up we get ourselves back and we do all of the things! We dye our hair, we go on that trip, we go for that job, we are unstoppable!

But why did we lose ourselves in the first place?

This hit home for me because I have been that girl in the past. I lost myself in the relationships. My focus was surrounding the man and making the relationship work. I neglected myself and my needs and pursuits and desires.

Looking back on my younger self, I was insecure in my relationships. I was insecure in myself. I neglected having a voice and doing things that made me happy. I thought if I put that man first and did everything “perfect” he would stay and the relationship would work. I thought that if I took the focus off of the relationship and did things for myself that it would be perceived as doing something bad, that the man would not approve, that I wasn’t being a good girlfriend.

Now let me just say, none of my boyfriends were controlling and holding me back. I was holding MYSELF back because of insecurities and beliefs that were ingrained in my head from growing up a certain way and being in a household where that was the dynamic.

I can also see how that was very co dependent on my part and highly anxiously attached. Constantly trying to people please to the detriment of myself. It was and seemed easier to just play small and lose myself and put others first and their needs and never really ask myself what I wanted to do or what I liked. If I did have a dream, whether big or small, well I would simply just do it later. And later came and went and weeks turned into months and in some cases, even years.

Insecurities and a low sense of worthiness with a good dose of fear have dictated most of my life along with a lack of self-love. Feeling like I am not worthy of having the dream life that I want to live.

Honestly its all lies. Lies that I have told myself to stay in my comfort zone. Because if I started thinking differently and speaking different words over myself and my life, well dang….that would require a new version of me to show up. It would require more responsibility, more transparency, more authenticity and it would bring an abundance of peace, joy and happiness?! Is that a bad thing?? No of course not, but when you have known a lot of the opposite, it’s just something that is ingrained in you and it takes awareness, work and willingness to live a different life.

Man… its taken me years to get to this point, to work through some bullshit to get on the other side of things. I am still riddled with insecurities at times, I mean hello I am human! I can be on a great streak and then stop or start to doubt myself. It is scary to hold myself accountable and go for what I want and not allow myself to be sidelined or distracted with life and excuses.

Look sometimes life hands you a slew of things and it does make it more challenging to be able to focus on yourself and really go for what you want and set out to be your best self.

However, when the dust settles and the waters are calm and nothing is happening, then what? Who do you have to blame? No one but yourself.

That is where I am right now. After a series of back-to-back major life events over the past few years from health challenges to divorce and then losing my dog to cancer and having to process and experiences grief. I feel that life is calm now. It’s time for me to try things that I want and go for it.

This blog is one of them, truly being intentional with this and putting out more content, connecting with others and continuing to just grow and thrive and be open to wherever life wants to take me and what is already destined for me

I have to take action though! It’s nice to write affirmations, its nice to put out those intentions into the universe to manifest and to pray, however if that’s where it ends then what?? POOF things will just fall into your lap? I WISH! Lol. Its action. Small actions of faith that show god and the universe that you are ready. You are ready for the next step, you are ready for what you have been asking for and your hearts desires. When you do that you will start to have things line up and the right people, resources and opportunities will come into your life. That’s when the magic starts to happen.

Sooo basically this is my declaration and accountability to myself. Continue to be consistent with my affirmations and prayers and most importantly be consistent with taking action!! Get comfortable with the uncomfortable. Look, nothing changes if nothing changes…am I right or am I right?!

Life is too short and too good to not be happy and go for what you want. Be bold, be fearless and let the older stories die, like bye bye deep down in the dirt. Let’s say a prayer and hold a funeral for them lol.

I’m sure if you are reading this and you are in the same spot as me then you get what I am saying and feel what I am feeling and to you I say let’s do this!!! And if you are reading this and want to be in this place, what I have to say to you is, YOU GOT THIS!! You are capable, you are worthy and deserving of all the success, love and health and healing!

Take one small step towards what you want even if it feels scary and uncomfortable. Just do it!! <3

xoxo